ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ,-¨-. ___________________________________________________ _____ |¨-¨| /Ż.-------------------------------------------------.`\ _=Ż_____Ż=_ | || Sal Stove February Cost: 1000 GP || / /Ż|Ż|Ż\ \ | || CAN'T DO THAT HERE || \_ \_|_|_/ _/=| || This month: Angry Video Game Nerds || / Ż=_______=Ż \ || Ripping Off Other People || |_ ŻŻŻŻŻ _| || Posting a Newsletter! SHOCK! || ( Ż==_//ŻŻ/\\_--Ż ) || Obscure References! Inside Jokes! || |Ż...||(=O||_==Ż| \`._________________________________________________.'/ //ŻŻ\\\__\// / `---------------------------------------------------Ż ||//__ ŻŻŻŻŻ__\\ h t t p : / / s a l a m a n d o . 2 y . n e t \\ ŻŻŻŻŻ/\ `\Ż| /\ \Ż\ /Ż/ /\ \Ż\ ||`|--. ... // .--. \\ //\\ || //\\ | \ / | //\\ | \ || ||Ż\\ //Ż\\ //ŻŻ\\ \\ ||__|| || ||__|| ||\\//|| ||__|| ||\\ || || || || || \`--. __ || ||--|| || ||--|| |#### |#####-||###| \#| |# ##### || _`ŻŻ.\ \\__// || || ||__/ || || #| || #| |# ||# #| |#_/# \\_// \\__// ---- -- -- ----- -- -- -### -- #- -# --# #- -#- ### --- `--¨ # # # # # # # #### # ### # ##### ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Table of Contents ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I. Another World of Inside Jokes What? We're productive? Floating Salamando 2: Packin' Heat Lots of hits. IN YOUR FAT FACE! What's this Brand New Quest shit? Zero Wing: Shut the Fuck Up It's a Wonderful Life Thumbs Up If I Had a Hammer, I'd Hammer Some Commies II. Bonus Material Kewl Moviez! Worst Songs EVER WrexArt EvkArt Subway Pervert Attack! III. Up and Coming IV. Interaction Salamando's Stove T-Shirts? WE WANT SOME STUFFS! I Would Expect No Less From the Son of Our Master V. If You Don't Give Us Feedback, Baby Jesus Will Cry Absurd Titles That Have Nothing To Do With the Content Building a Birdhouse in my Soul VI. Pistolero We Really Like Anime Music ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I. Another World of Inside Jokes ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Another month or two, another newsletter. The number one thing that is hard about doing these is that it is next to impossible to find any decent amusing gifts to give you. You know we make these because we love you, and just want to give you the love you deserve. Lord knows that jerk you've been hanging out with lately doesn't give them to you. What, are you dating already? Then why do you never let him in your house after your so-called dates? Huh? Why does he never stay for coffee or perhaps something more? Are you trying to take things slowly? Trying not to scare him away? What does this look like, a Takahashi story? Well let me tell you, you're not Kyoko and he's not Godai. Oh no, you're not Kyoko at all. No, I see you at night. I see through your teasingly half-open blinds in your soul. Also in your windows. No, baby, you're your own woman. So independent and refreshing. Also perky, but not slutty. Ooh how those plain white panties give you such a good-girl look... And those shimmering pink satin ones you wear when you're feeling frisky- Cute and reserved, but with just a tad of interest. Oh how you always wear them on your dates, just in case things get that far... How I long to feel your delightfully soft curves under them, but for now I'll just bide my time... watching, always watching from afar. How much I've wished to be by your side, but until then I'll be in the car parked across the street. I'll win your heart some day, my love... Which reminds me, if you find something funny, amusing, and video-game related that you find or make, give it to us and we'll distribute it in our next newsletter! But I mean, we're not going to hand out anyone's shit. For example, good would be like Closer to Mario, where someone made a remix of NIN's Closer, with Mario music and sound effects. On the other hand, bad would be a screen shot of someone playing Dragon Warrior where they named themselves Assclown. We usually don't give any credit to the stuff we steal but that's because we genuinely don't know where it comes from. We'll mention you if you do send us stuff so buy me a squid ice cream and we'll call it even. Oh yeah, welcome if this is your first newsletter. You can read our archives at http://salamando.listbot.com/ or you can go to http://salamando.2y.net/magazine/ and get them there. We have 220 members at the time of releasing this, which I'm sure is a statistic none of you care about. I'll be in my room with the gun in my mouth now. ___________________________________________________________________________ What?! We're Actually Productive?! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Ha! Fooled you! But we have been posting more regularly even though we are caring less about having any old shit done every couple of days. It's not bad, maybe one good update per week, which is probably our overall average after taking into account times when we're crazy commies posting daily or also when we're sleepy socialists posting maybe once every month. But the critical thing is that we have more stuff to do than time to do it which is good. Usually when we do nothing it'b because your mother's ugly face made us forget everything we were going to do and then we run out of ideas and end up selling our semen for reefers. But not now! Now we have enough ideas and already finished stuff to keep us going for at least a month of bi-weekly or semi-daily updating. And now Salamando should tell you if we've updated since you've seen us, too. So check back every now and again and we'll probably have something new, and if not, you can lose a few hands of Blackjack to Salamando and run away crying like the sissy you are. ___________________________________________________________________________ Floating Salamando 2: Packin' Heat - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So you should've noticed Floating Salamando is back. In his present incarnation, he does all the stuff he did before except now he also tells you when we've updated. Eventually we have some more stuff planned for him, like him yelling at you depending on what day of the week it is. And mabye... uh... well. Actually that's all we have planned right now because we can't really think of anything else. He plays BLACKJACK, people! What more do you WANT?! ... And no, he DOESN'T cheat at blackjack. He's just lucky. Really really lucky. Unbelievably lucky. Always beat you or tie you lucky. That SOB. Also I wish Wrex hadn't written about floating Salamando up there because he said a lot of what I was going to say, which I went ahead and said anyway. Shut up, okay? Do you think you could do better? Because you couldn't. Yeah, I'd like to see you TRY. That's right. You slut. ___________________________________________________________________________ Lots of hits. IN YOUR FAT FACE! -WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So for some reason, we've been getting a lot of hits lately. I mean this is kinda crazy, like 700 in one week, etc. We usually get closer to 300 or something. So I turned on document referer on! Ha ha ha! Soon I will know how you got here, foolies! But yeah, this fills us with hubris and hopefully we won't sell out and become assholes like Seanbaby. One possible source of fresh meat was from a Salon article we got mentioned in! (http://www.salon.com/tech/inbox/index.html/index.html) It makes me sound like a big ol' whiner, and stuff, but oh well. Unfortunately, me being the king of dumbasses, I accidentally spelled it "salamado.2y.net". OOPS. It's fixed though, as I simply created a new virtual host with the name salamado and linked it to the article and now we're all having a big gay fun orgy. But anyway, according to Evk, I got mentioned by name by Salon. Which means that now I'm famous! Ha ha ha. Book signings will start next week. (note: I think it may be archived here: http://www.salon.com/tech/inbox/index.html/archives/2001/01/18/1637/) ___________________________________________________________________________ What's this Brand New Quest shit? - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Wrex told me to justify my Brand New Quest comics, so here goes: They're a spoof. I bet you've guessed by now, but yes, they ARE supposted to be that bad. The idea behind them is that they're making fun of really terrible webcomics by being... well... a really terrible webcomic. Notice how often times a character will yell something like JOKES ARE FOR FAGS which sarcastically sums up my position: Webcomics without jokes are as pointless as... something really pointless. Look, shut up, okay? They get better, by the way. By the time Hulk Hogan appears, they should be genuinely amusing instead of just visually offensive. One hopes. ___________________________________________________________________________ Zero Wing: Shut the Fuck Up - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I'm sure most of you have read our "Death of Zero Wing" article, where we laid the joke to rest. I would like to apologize, for just the day before, we had a reference to it. I was just so blind to the increasing lameness of the joke- the rapid tiredness and overuse. I think all of our feelings of the joke are summed up pretty nicely by Sak, one of the creators of the site "Zany Video Game Quotes," which has since been sucked into the Mu. Where's the dimensional interlude?! =========================================================================== WHAT HAPPEN!? SOMEONE MADE THIS QUOTE COMPLETELY OVERUSED AND UNFUNNY! Or "Why I Fucking Hate That Goddamn Zero Wing Quote" Wazzup! Where's the beef! Whachoo' talkin' 'bout, Willis? Hit me in the testicles with a tack hammer! All popular catch phrases in their day. Similar to one that is sweeping the net off it's feet. One that's so long, I won't even begin to fucking describe it. About a year ago, Lago posted this quote sent it by a reader to a site we run called Zany Video Game Quotes. It got some pretty wild reactions, and we actually thought it was fucking hilarious. I had never seen such a bad translation in my life. Besides this one Japanese porno Lago translated, where basically every fucking bubble was "LET US FUCK!!! DO THE MONKEY (PLZ)". Back to the actual topic - this Zero Wing quote is everywhere. There's a movie about it. A song about it. Cliff Buttfuckski or whatever his name is uses it. It's on someone's signature in mailing list for an obscure musician I subscribe to. People - it's not funny. You use this goddamn quote for nearly everything you do. "Hey Jim, I'm going to take a shit." "Well, John, you better watch out - I heard someone set you up the bomb in there!" "HOOOWEE! Good one, Jim! WHAT YOU SAY? Haha!" "Yeah, you better MOVE ZIG!" Please remove your cock from this quote's mouth, alright? I know how hard it is for you to let go of pop-culture catch phrases sometimes, but this one really needs to die. So, here's what I've decided to do. I've got a new catch phrase for you. Since you guys seems to like really long, winding, totally inane quotes, here's one I got from a Camper Van Beethoven bootleg that mentions the infamous Mentone Donuts: "Alright, this was the best fucking donuts you ever had. It's four in the morning, and you're doing everything you can do? And there's this BIG donut place, and you've got to go there. And it's on the way to mountains, where it's really cool." Knock yourselves out kids. Post this to your message boards where you discuss wrestling, video games and your pathetic fucking lives. I hope this catches on like wildfire, and I'm sure it will. It has the same sheer amount of charismatic and comedic power as the Zero Wing quote, and who doesn't fucking like donuts? If you don't like donuts, you're going to hell. Jesus says so. -Mr. Sak T. Boner =========================================================================== So there you have it, straight from the guy who "popularized" the quote before it became a big fucking deal. You have our solemn pledge that we will do everything in our powers never to use this joke again. Even after it's long dead and forgotten by the general public, simply mentioning "What you say" will make me shed a crystal tear of the one whose virginity was stolen by the rape of the mainstream. It's symbolism, you dicksickle. ___________________________________________________________________________ It's a Wonderful Life - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So we got some absolutely wonderful E-mail a while ago. Even though it's obviously not real hate mail, it's the effort that receives a gold star. So to sum up: This email = good. If you want to get on our good side, something like this definitely does it: =========================================================================== d00d, lkie teh new KWEST COMIX SUCK ASS< d00d!!!!111111 TEHY DOn"T leki MAKE ENY SENcES< d00d!!!1!!!1111 Wat R teyh soposed too meen///??????///????//??/?///??? /\/\4K3 /\/\0R3 R3\/13\/\/5 F0R FUnnY J4P4N3S3 5N35 g4M3Z. HOBO CHOCOBO AND SAD BAD OWNZ j00!!!!!!!!1111111 Put them in mroe tsuff!!!111 ADN MEOR Q&A>>>> sUMONoERS RULES!!!!!!1111 TEHY LEKI POW!!!111 EFREET!!!!!11 BooM1111 Thy Hit PiONTs haTh Bean REDUSED By 999999999999999999999999999999!!!!!!!11111 DRAG-ON WARRIER SuX ASS TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111 =========================================================================== I liked this so much, in fact, I ended up giving this guy a one-type guest shot in Brand New Quest. I have no idea if the one with him in it is posted yet, and frankly I don't care enough to check; My mother is inconsolable. ___________________________________________________________________________ SAMBSU UPPO! (thumbs up) - RekkuSouru ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So, we've actually been getting a lot of feedback lately! I'm not going to tell exactly who sent us a kind word, but regardless, Everyone who gave us any sort of feedback or email about the page, thumbs up. Even if it was just a post on our message board, pat yourself on the back. Good! Now rub your shirt a bit. Mmm that's good. Show me a bit of skin. Ooh yeah that's great. Oh yeah, now your pants! Ooh daddy likes that! Daddy likes that! Mmm yeah. I really like raspberry gummy bears. And Reeces Pieces. Your life is now complete for having acquired this knowledge. You may close your email client or web browser now and ascend into the next level of human consciousness. ___________________________________________________________________________ If I Had a Hammer, I'd Hammer Some Commies - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Being a writer can be hard. I don't mean in the sense of not being able to write, or nobody liking my work or anything like that, but in the sense that I'm afraid one day bees are going to read something I've written and come after me. I mean, I havn't exactly been pro-bee; The only time I mention bees at all is the Miracle Girls article where I said it wasn't as much fun to shoot a bee with bosoms and a ribbon as it was to shoot you partner. What if some right-wing bee sees that and gets riled up? Next thing you know, I'm found dead of bee stings. And then what will my legacy be? Evk Damascus, man stung to death by bees? Will people in the future look up to me and go "Wow! I hope -I- can get stung to death by bees one day!"? Of course not. See, this is the thing I have to worry about. Mostly after drinking bleach. Kiss me, son of god! GF summoning! ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ II. Bonus Material ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ Kewl Moviez! - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So, I decided I'd make a copy of the Mega Man X5 opening movie. And I did. Then I went and made copies of the Evil Zone opening and prolouge. I sent them to Wrex, who in true dumbass fashion, thought they were the Persona opening movies. I guess he gets incredibly weird games mixed up easily. What a bitch. So what was I talking about? Oh - yeah. Opening movies. The X5 one is definitely recommended. The Evil Zone introduction makes it look a lot more serious than it is, and the prologue's worth it just to hear a guy tell you that you must save Happy Island in a very dramatic voice. I'm lover and grapple! http://sradio.2y.net/downloads/x5.avi http://sradio.2y.net/downloads/EZO.avi http://sradio.2y.net/downloads/EZP.avi ___________________________________________________________________________ Worst Songs EVER. I mean EVER. - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ As a sadistic hobby, Evk has made it a point to collect as many bad songs as he can. In fact, I'd have to say these are some of the worst songs ever! And as a great service to you, our readers, we present three of the most offensively gut-wrenching mp3s ever to curse the internet. Fear them. Download them. Delete them. http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/worstsong1.mp3 http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/worstsong2.mp3 http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/worstsong3.mp3 And for all you people in TV land, if you have any truly horribly offensive songs, then please email us and we'll take them from you! Don't send them to us by email because, well, we do have mailbox size limits, but yeah. We'll be very appreciative. Perhaps in the future, we'll make Worst Songs Ever CDs, and sell them. And hopefully nobody will sue us for copyright infringement. It would be pretty cool if we did get sued by say, Hulk Hogan though. I would laugh for days. ___________________________________________________________________________ WrexArt - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ WrexSoul, unlike me, can actually draw, which makes me insanely jealous. In fact, those of you out there in the reading audience who can draw - I hate you. I hope you drown in your own stinking excrement. Aside from that, when he's not busy fielding phone calls for his roommate, Wrex does and scans drawings, ranging anywhere from an anime version of Picard to Marle naked and me giggling, which I hope he doesn't show too many people. There goes my dignity. So anyway we'll have a section of his drawings soon. E-mazing. ___________________________________________________________________________ EvxArt - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Since I can't draw, I do the next best thing: Take a bunch of images and overlay them on top of each other until they look neat and call them 'art'. At least that's what I do now. I used to just hit Enhance Lines until I had a huge mess of black and white garbage. I used to spend a great deal of time doing this. However, just as a rose can grow out of a fetid pile of shit, so has my 'art' turned into something pretty nifty. That'll be up soon too. Tentacles rapid attack! ___________________________________________________________________________ Subway Pervert Attack! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ As you should know, we're making a new webpage. Actually, the only thing left for us to do is create the launching article. In case you're wondering what we'll have there, it'll mostly be crazy shit like Salamando's Stove. Only less Video-gamey. And perhaps more boobs. And crazy Sanrio-like bears who are like Tonberries. But I'm not getting into that. The site, as you may have gleaned from the countless posts or possibly the self-mentioning title, is "Subway Pervert Attack!" or, if you're turning Japanese, "Chikatetsu no Chikan Kougeki!" I'm really quite enamored with this layout. Say "konnichiwa" to Toyotomi Hideyoshi! ___________________________________________________________________________ Creepy-ass MP3 File! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Interested in a new Investment Opportunity? Are you tired of all the rest? Well look no further!!! This is the start of an EXPLO$IVE OPPORTUNITY! IT'S SIMPLE! IT'S FUN! And MOST OF ALL... IT CAN MAKE YOU RICH!!!! It's also a creepy mp3 as you might guess. This is what happen when I'm bored. And I decide to cut+paste sections of creepy songs. Don't mind me. I'll be over here scratching my ass. http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/creepy2.mp3 ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ III. Up and Coming ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ Tears of the Planet. Hearts of the People. - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Well, we just put up What You Say Vestalman?!, brought back floating Salamando, AND held a funeral for Zero Wings. Next up, I hope to make this review of Evil Zone I wrote funny. Because right now it isn't. Then we're going to review some crazy Japanese ROMs, because, to be frank, that's what people want. Well, everyone who counts anyway. ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ IV. Interaction ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ Salamando's Stove T-shirts - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So we've been told we should have Salamando's Stove T-shirts. We found this one place called Cafepress that lets you design them and does all the real work for you, the problem with that is that the shirts cost like $15.00 and we only get $3. On the other hand, we could make our own shirts, but they would take a while to ship as we'd have to go custom make one for you and you'd have to pay by check or cash, and there would only be one or two designs. On the other hand, we'd charge a lot less and get to keep any profit we made. So mail us and let us know which you'd prefer. If nobody mails us at all, we'll assume you were treating the wounds you incurred while wrestling in hot corn, what with the third-degree burns and the hammerlock. ___________________________________________________________________________ WE WANTS SOME STUFFS! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So as you should know for no real reason that it's my birthday soon! You may heap gifts upon me for verily yea, um... some uh stuff. But if you're poor and want to be really cool or just happen to know anyway, there are some stuffs that we want but can't find. If you can help us we will heap praise upon you with sincere gratitude. So right, first off is a PSX import game called "Senkyu." It's a puzzle game with colored marbles that fall down a tetris-like well in groups of 3. It was translated and released in arcades as "Battle Balls" and this is how I found it. Then they took it away, the bastards! So now I'm seriously craving getting my huge puzzle action on. Also Evk really really really really hontouni wants Japan All Women's Wrestling. If anyone knows where we can get this or has a copy or a Japanese friend or anything, we really really really want these games. We'll pay money for them. We'll pay overpriced rates for them. We'll sell our firstborns for them. Especially if our firstborn is anything like Bloog. Nevermind, inside joke. ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ V. YOU SEE THIS FLOOR OF DIRT? I NO BELIEVE IT! ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ _____________________________________ |[!] Alert! [_][=][x]| |=====================================| | | | You are a fag. | | | | Press OK to continue packing fudge. | | | | [ Ok ] | |_____________________________________| ___________________________________________________________________________ Contact Information ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ WrexSoul http://salamando.2y.net/misc/wrexsoul.html wrexsoul@salamando.net ICQ: 902240 AIM: WrexSoulll (HAS SEX WITH ANIMALS FOR MONEY) \/. vvv Evk X Damascus http://salamando.2y.net/misc/evk.html evk@salamando.net ICQ: 11029633 AIM: ArchEvk (Don't talk to me) Also: Lots of people you don't know. ___________________________________________________________________________ What do you here? ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ PUCKER UP: http://salamando.net/ Rub elbows with your betters: http://avian76.virtualave.net/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=forum&f=11 Become one with the fun: http://otakufeh.keenspace.com/ Sure, be afraid: (in Winamp, Add URL:) http://sradio.2y.net:8000 ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ IV. DRAW A CARD? ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ I'm a Dancing Summer Mix! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ You know catch words? Like how after learning a word, you'll use it over and over again? Both because it's NEW and KEWL and also to reinforce the learning of the word so you don't like... forget? My word of the week: esoteric. In case you don't know, or only know vaguely it means pertaining to a small group of individuals. I've made note of it because it describes my webpage almost wholly. While most people can find some stuff funny, most of the jokes are really inside-jokish and stuff. Right, as if you didn't know. But still, fuck you, clown! ___________________________________________________________________________ WrexSoul stole my title. HOLD ME - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So that's it. These things take less and less time to complete every time we do one. Unfortunately, I didn't feel very amusing while writing this one, so if you didn't like it, that's why. Then again, if you didn't like it, you can feel free to commit suicide, ritual or otherwise. ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ >8 ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So we survived another blast of great gay text once again. This one probably wasn't nearly as cool as the last one but how could we follow such an amazing performance? I think we all know the answer to that: Dwarves. Yes, if somehow we could bin-hex encode dwarves, I'm sure we would send them. Perhaps as an attachment or something. But regardless, I feel a little disheartened that there are no addendums this time. But that's okay, because soon we'll have Subway Pervert Attack! and you can get your weekly blast of this shit then.