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WHAT THE HELL IS SALAMANDO'S STOVE?!

Salamando's Stove is a nexus of pure entertainment. Quite the Baskin Robins of amusing webpages, if by 31 flavors you actually mean several differnt ways of jerking pure humor in your faces. You're at the webpage part right now. Actually, that's most of it. The other parts things like Salamando Radio and our magazine which I'll cover in due course.

OKAY, so... Salamando's Stove is one of the only humor-based semi-adult classic videogame sites. Actually the only one we know of that we'll admit to. We really don't know how to describe it, but who cares. We cover stuff from the nintendo era up to present day with our own brand of twisted humor and dongs. Things like reviwing games, which admittedly aren't bombshells of wild and crazy randomness, but at least we're brutally honest, with a humerous air. We focus mainly on RPG games 'cause we like 'm but we'll cover any old crap game one of us happens to own. Besides reviewing any old $10 game we picked up at Babbages/Software Etc, or some weird Japanese ROM we happened across, we also amazingly do other shit!

For instance, there's our features. They're special stuff like the Script Shredder, which is like video game Mad Libs, or other original toys. Basically it equates to "we spent a lot of time on this" so you go and see or we'll release the dogs. And the bees. And the dogs, with bees in their mouths, so when the bark, they shoot bees at you!

And of course we also have our comics, which everyone loves, even Josef Stalin. Our comic dosn't really have a name and sometimes production stops for a couple weeks but read 'em anyway, okay? Don't blame us if you heradins can't get our jokes because usually the punchline is just random shit anyways. Either that or play more video games, an always commendable goal.

Then there are downloads, which aren't really things like L337 WAR3Z, but more like anything random that we do that we decide you need to get and run and possibly infect your computer with our s00p3r h4x0r1ng sk1LLz. Erm, right. We do have obscure Japanese roms, worthless images we made, and the original Corey Betz programs! :O This kind of rare treat cannot be found just anwhere, and should not be overlooked. In the war against Lamers, this man is a living legend.

Last is Misc, which is where everything without a home goes, even Hobo-Chocobo. We have a bit of Stove exposition stuff like this, some self-glorification, and some topless dancers. Also included are 14 members of parliment, a bread machine, some lint removers, and 60 hours of pirated anime. Okay I was lying about all that. Blow me.

Other shit besides the lovely webpage is Salamando Radio, run by myself, which pumps videogame music goodness into your ears and other orifces 24 hours a day, unless I forgot to turn it on. If you want to connect to Salamando Radio fire up WinAmp, hit Ctrl + L and type in:

http://sradio.2y.net:8000
You can also use Real Player 7, but that sucks big donkey dix, so we boycot it and its fascist advertisement-streaming bastardishness.

Also, we have a 'magazine', which is really only called that to fool gullible people and play up the fact that I want to make cover images. The newsletter is a monthy blast of pure creative gayness into your mailbox. It has exclusive shit like mature rated stuff (since we don't try to openly offend), members-only stuff the general public isn't allowed to see, and generic rants. You can sign up for it below, or probably follow some link to get more information.

Salamando's Stove is made by two losers, Evk and WrexSoul. Sure, some other people sometimes write for us, but really we're the ones who do all of the non-submitted content, all the page layout, run all the other shit and gyeah, basically everything. You can read more about us in our personal pages, or our contact information page.

Salamando's Stove is hosted right now in Evk's house on UkyoBot, his computer. It also hosts the entirity Salamndo Radio, so as you can guess, it's pretty taxed. Soon, we hope to get another computer to host the Stove, but until then, you'll unfortunatley have to deal with the slowness.

So now that you know what Salamando's Stove is or something, go forth and read it before I beat your fucking brains in. Go on, get outta here!


 
Salamando's Stove is all a big ol' 1999-2000 Zach Francks and Nick Hammer.